I’m exhausted. I worked all weekend plus went out at night. It’s tiring…but fun, so I guess I shouldn’t complain. On Friday night the whole gang got together at Terry’s house. He bought Dance Dance Revolution for PlayStation 2 so we were playing all night. That game is addicting! Everyone thought I’d be the best at it since I’m a dancer but Molly kicked everyone’s butts!

Saturday night was just me and Josh. We went out to dinner and then took a ghost tour in New Hope. It was pretty cool. I had no idea that the area was so haunted.

The rest of the weekend I was running around between the swim club and the dance studio. I love both jobs but it’s hard trying to work both of them at once.

Tonight I have to go back to the swim club to help Jennifer paint sets for the play. I remember how stressed I was last year so I want to try to help her as much as I can.

After that I’m going over to Molly’s. She freaking out a little because Alex is coming home at the end of the week and they haven’t talked much since he left. I don’t know what’s going on with him. He was so crazy about Molly, but he’s hardly called her since he went away. I may have to give him a good kick in the pants!

I know it's been almost two weeks. But it's summer and I've been busy! :)

Last week I was in Tennessee visiting the grandparents. My parents were there as well. My dad was on good behavior since we were visiting his family. Figures.

I missed Josh like crazy the whole time I was there. Molly called me on Friday night and told me that he missed me too, so that's a plus. :) I was counting down the minutes until I got home the whole time I was there.

When I got to the Philadelphia airport on Saturday I was itching to get home. I was on the escalator down to the baggage claim and I saw him standing there waiting for me! I practically squealed when I saw him. I ran into his arms the minute I got to the bottom. So much for playing things cool. He had convinced Aunt Lu to let him pick me up. It was probably better that way since her hip is still bothering her and it's hard for her to drive more than a few minutes.

Things have been really good since I got home. We've been together every day. Things are exactly the way I imaged. The only problem is that I'm afraid that I'm falling faster and harder than he is. Every night when he kisses me good night, I'm so afraid I'm going to confess how deeply I feel. I can feel the words waiting in my throat to come out and I don't want to say them. I don't want to scare him off. I don't want to ruin things. So for now, I'm keeping quiet.

This year the swim club is doing a bachelorette auction instead of a bachelor auction. Henry wants me to do it but I feel weird because of Josh. I don't want to go out with some random guy when I already have the most amazing guy ever!

Today was great. I love rainy days. I went to work but they sent a few of us home because of the weather. So Josh and I went back to his house. We cuddled up on the couch in the basement and watched TV for hours. It was perfect...until the rain cleared and he got called to go back to work. Oh well, it was great while it lasted. :)

I went out to dinner with Lindsay. Now I'm waiting for Molly. She was working the snack bar at the swim club all night. She just got home a little while ago and we're supposed to go over to Kelly's house.

Not too much to report. Just enjoying the summer while I can. I love having Josh around. I think I'm going to go crazy next week when I'm in Tennessee!

I'm worried about Molly. She hasn't been herself lately. I know she's upset about Alex being in Europe for the next few weeks so we went out for a girl's night last night. I was hoping she would talk about Alex but she didn't want to. It was a fun evening but I wish she would open up to me about what's going on. She hasn't been herself since he left last week.

Things have been really busy with work. Between the swim club and the dance studio I'm always working. I've been at the swim club every day this week. I'm working at the dance studio tonight. I'm not complaining though. I'm getting Saturday off and then I have off for a few days next week so I'm meeting my parents in Tennessee so that we can visit my grandparents. I'll be there Wednesday, Thursday and Friday and coming back on Saturday.

This Saturday is another date with Josh. I'm still expecting to wake up and find out that this whole thing has been a dream. He's just so sweet, and so wonderful. I keep waiting for the other shoe to drop. Can anyone really be that incredible?

We've been spending more time together. We both worked the evening shift Tuesday night, and then went back to his house and watched the movie "Hitch" (very good!). Yesterday we had lunch together at the club. Tonight he's picking me up at the dance studio and we're going to get ice cream. It just all seems to perfect. It's exactly what I've wanted. I just wish I could relax and enjoy it. I'm so afraid that I'm going to ruin it by acting all paranoid. I just can't help it. Good things like this don't usually happen to me. It's hard to believe it's real.

The worrying is all worth it though. Everytime we're together things are so great. I am so crazy about him. I just don't want it to end.

I haven't had much time to write with Natalie here and then getting ready for yesterday's big 4th of July party at the swim club. Things have been busy but really great. Actually, really great is an understatement.

Natalie left last Tuesday and my attention was turned completely to the party. On Wednesday Henry informed me that he wanted Josh to be the main attraction at the kissing booth. I wasn't really happy about it, but Henry reminded me that the money the club makes goes towards scholarships for the campers and that Josh would make the most money at the booth. Josh didn't seem too happy about the idea either but he agreed to do it.

On Thursday, Molly, Henry, Jennifer, Terry, Jill and I spent the day outside putting up the booths for the party. It was a long, hot day, and I learned that even my Florida skin can't handle that much sun. For the first time in my life I was burnt to a crisp. I've never been burnt before and had no idea how painful sunburn is. I guess my skin isn't used to the sun as much now that I'm in Pennsylvania.

That night Josh stopped by after work. Aunt Lu was out so I actually had him all to myself for a little while. He had heard from Lauren that I was sunburnt so he stopped by to make sure I was all right! So sweet... He rubbed aloe on my back for me, and then we started kissing and I realized that I'm falling really hard really fast. Maybe he noticed or thought the same thing because he told me he should get going.

I didn't see him again until Saturday night when I went out to dinner with his parents and grandparents. It was a great dinner. Being from Florida made the conversation roll easily with his grandparents since they just moved down there last year. I told them about some great restaurants and stores.

After dinner Josh and I took a walk through town and he held my hand. I don't know what it is about hand holding, but I almost like it better than kissing him. I guess part if it is me wanting everyone to know that he cares about me, and walking around holding hands says that pretty loud and clear. The best part was running into Nancy. The look on her face with priceless.

Yesterday was the big party at the swim club. I was having a fabulous time watching all of the kids have a fabulous time. The only person not having a fabulous time was Josh. He was supposed to work the booth until 2:30 but around 1:30 Jill found me and told me he wanted to see me. I took a bottle of water and some chapstick with me thinking he just needed a break but he looked stressed and said he didn't want to do it anymore. I got in line behind the last girl to let people know that we were closing until Josh's replacement got there. Henry wasn't thrilled about it but it was almost 2:00 by the time Josh finished up the line.

After that he hung out with me, helping the kids play games and making sure things ran smoothly. I felt really bad that he was miserable at the kissing booth. I teased him that most guys would love to have girls lining up to kiss them. He pulled me close, gave me an amazing kiss and said, "I had to at least kiss a girl that I want to kiss." It was so sweet and I grabbed him and kissed him again. We didn't notice his mother and Lauren walking up to us. His mom was like, "I thought the kissing booth was closed!" It was embarrassing but Mrs. Anderson didn't seem phased.

The swim club closed at 4:00 and we did clean up until 6:00. Then it was off to a BBQ at Kelly's house. After we ate Josh and I went into town and watched the fireworks together. He asked me to go out again Friday night. It's so weird because I still have a hard time believing this is for real. My head keeps expecting something bad to happen because it seems like good things like this don't happen to me. But my heart trusts him, and I keep remembering that that's what I have to hold on to.

I guess I'm just scared because I was crazy about him before but now I'm really falling. Falling hard and falling fast. Everytime he walks me to the door and kisses me good night I'm terrified that I'm going to say something that he's not ready to hear. I just have to remember to continue to play it cool.