It's been a tough few days and I'm exhausted. I found out last night that my father has liver cancer. That was what my mom wanted to talk to me about. I got to Aunt Lu's and we called my father and he told me. They are going to remove a piece of his liver next week.

I held it together pretty well but I was freaking out inside. It's no surprise to anyone that my father and I aren't that close, but I would never wish this on him. It's scary to me and it's not even me going through it.

When I left Aunt Lu's I skipped going to the dance competition and headed straight home. Josh and I were still fighting but I needed to see him. Jason answered the door when I got there and he could tell right away that something was wrong. I was trying to keep it together but the minute Josh came to the door I fell apart.

I don't know what that is. How come I could keep it together so well, but the minute I saw him I just started sobbing? He seemed stunned but he pulled me into his arms and let me cry until I could compose myself.

We ended up staying up half the night talking. I told him about my father and we talked about that for awhile. Then we talked about the Kelly mess. He confirmed what Natalie had said: he's trying to protect Jason. He's afraid Jason will be completely humiliated when he finds out what Kelly did.

I understand it better now. Josh doesn't want to hurt his best friend. I still want Kelly to pay though. She deserves some karmic payback for the crappy way she treats people. But Josh convinced me that it's not my place to get revenge. He also assured me that I'm the only one he wants.

Tonight I have to go to the dance studio. Mona was understanding when I explained why I wasn't there last night, but I don't want to take advantage. Besides, I know that getting on the dance floor will help take my mind off of thing, and it's Cha Cha night - my favorite dance. I normally would be on the road by now but Josh called and told me that he's going to drive me. I'm perfectly capable of driving myself, but I think he wants to take care of me so I'm going to let him. It's sweet and it means a lot to me.