Last night was Lauren's birthday party. I saw Josh right away. He gave me a hug and I thought, "now this is where I belong." Unfortunately, it doesn't look like I'll be spending any time in Josh's arms. We were talking and getting along great and then he said, "I know about Mark." I was about to tell him we broke up. I was saying, "About that..." when he cut me off and told me it was okay and that I didn't owe him any explanation. Then he said, "I just started seeing someone."

AAARRRRRRGGGGGGGHHHHHHHH!!! I feel so stupid. I totally set myself up for this. It would be just my luck that I'd start thinking about getting back together with him and then he'd start dating someone else. What was I thinking?

I ended up leaving the party early and heading to Nat's. I just couldn't stay over night. I was too annoyed with myself. It was pretty late when I got there so I just crashed. When I got up this morning Molly was the only person around.

I hated having to admit to her what I fool I'd been. She thinks that I should stay as far away from Josh as possible. She told me that I should go find Mark and beg him to take me back. Like that would happen. I don't beg and even if I did, he wouldn't take me back. This is just a disaster.