They sent me home from work. It's raining and they closed the pool so there wasn't much to do. The weather is kind of matching my mood. It's dreary out and I'm bummed about Josh being away.

I just can't get him out of my head! (I'm not trying to sound like a Kylie song.) I hated being at work without him there. I miss him so much!

Why didn't I tell him how I feel? Why didn't I hold onto him and not let go?

The most amazing human being I have ever come in contact with has walked out of my life and there is nothing I can do about it.

Last night when I got home, I sat on my bed smelling the dress that I wore on the dinner cruise because there's a slight trace of his cologne on it. Is that pathetic or what?

I really wish Molly were around (she's on vacation). I think she would help take my mind off of things. Lauren asked me to help her pick out some clothes for school tonight. I'm just worried that being at Josh's house with his family might be too hard for me.