I'm still really mad at Josh. He's called a few times and I haven't answered or called him back. I just need some cooling off time. I'm still really steamed. Don't I have the right to be?

Molly is ticked off at Kelly. I guess Kelly called her last night because she knew that Kelly was in New York the whole weekend. Molly told Kelly what I've been saying. She told Kelly to cry to a girlfriend instead of Josh. I guess Kelly didn't like Molly's advice because they got into a fight over it. Molly's annoyed because Kelly made a point to email Jason and tell him that she was hanging out with Josh in New York all weekend. Molly thinks Kelly's just playing games to get at Jason and is mad that it's causing problems for me and Josh. She's not the only one who's mad.

But I'm more mad at Josh than Kelly. I'm not really that close to Kelly and I don't expect much from her. She's not the kind of person I'd be best friends with (which is weird since we share a best friend), but I expect a lot from Josh. He has my heart and the power to break it and he knows that. He says he loves me, and yet he does something that he knows will hurt me. That's not how you show love. I deserve better than that, and I'm not going to settle for less. He needs to make his choice: me or her. I'm through with playing games.

I got a few more college acceptance letters (and a few rejects...I guess my math grades weren't good enough for some of my dad's choices). The acceptance letters are making my decision very difficult. Two of the schools in New York that I wanted both accepted me, but I'm scared to live there. I thought it's what I wanted but now I start to feel nervous when I think about actually living there.

Oh, well...American Idol is on. Maybe it will help take my mind off things. I need to vote for Katherine this week. I love her and can't believe she was in the bottom three last week!