I saw Josh last night. He came to me. Told me that he still loves me. Pulled me into his arms and kissed me like we had never been apart and would never be apart again. Then I woke up.

It's agonizing. I spent the day thinking about him, feeling like he was just with me. I haven't dreamt about him in a few weeks. I guess it was seeing Jason the other night and having a conversation about Josh with someone who is close to him that stirred my subconscious mind.

It's hard enough not thinking about him while I'm awake. Now I have to deal with thinking about him while I'm asleep - and I have no control over it! I can't control what happens when I fall asleep and my mind stops filtering what my heart is trying to express.

I want it to stop. I want to just forget about him and move on. Enough is enough. It has been almost two months since the break up. Shouldn't I be more over him by now?