Yesterday sucked. I just couldn't get over Josh being gone despite Molly, Natalie and Amanda's efforts to make me forget. We went out for a little while and then I asked them to take me home. I just wasn't in the mood to be out trying to have fun.

We went back to the house and I was going crazy. I kept telling Natalie that I was upset that I looked so horrible when Josh left that morning. Finally she said, "Get up. I'm driving you to the airport so that you can say good-bye to him." I hesitated for a minute and then I grabbed my makeup bag (wanted to make sure I looked good this time) and we were running out the door. As we were getting in the car we saw Jason and the next thing I knew he was going with us.

I was afraid we'd miss Josh, that he'd get through security before we got there, but I didn't want to call him because I was afraid he'd tell me to go home. We got to the airport and raced to the security line. Josh was in the middle of it when we got there and I suddenly felt bad about pulling him out of line. I was ready to turn and walk away but he spotted us and got out of line.

I was ready to apologize for showing up there but he just pulled me into his arms and kissed me. When he pulled away he smiled and said, "I'm glad you didn't listen to me." I told him that I just had to say good-bye one more time because I didn't want his last image of me to be crying with red, puffy eyes and day old makeup running down my face. He just smiled at me and said, "I have never once thought that you looked bad. Even with makeup running down your face, you are the most beautiful person I've ever seen." We talked for a few minutes and even though I was sad, I felt a lot better after talking to him again. He told me that he expects to find me waiting for him under the mistletoe when he returns in December. I promised I'd be there.

Afterwards Natalie, Jason and I went out to dinner and they just kept talking to me non-stop. I'm sure they wanted to keep me from falling apart again.

Today the girls took me out for another get-your-mind-off-of-Josh day. We went to King of Prussia for shopping and as I was walking around the mall I got a call from an unknown number. It was Josh! He wanted to let me know he got there okay. He said he wasn't feeling that great because he didn't sleep on the plane and the jet lag was getting to him. He told me that he misses me. I was just so happy to hear from him. I didn't expect him to call so soon. Hearing his voice made me feel so much better. I just can't wait until he's home again and we're standing together under the mistletoe...