It's early morning and I'm sitting in my room surrounded by stuff. I hate packing. I don't know where to put anything, how to organize anything, and this blog is just making it easy for me to procrastinate even more. I know I have to get this done. Josh is coming over at 10:00 to drive with me to New Jersey and I am so not ready.

Last night was my last night at the swim club. Josh came over and helped me close because the girl that was supposed to close with me got sick. I wanted to swim and he wanted to go out. I told him that it will be our last chance for a late night swim at the club. He told me that I was crazy. He is convinced that we'll be back at the swim club again. I just don't know... I feel like it's an end of an era.

Maybe I'm clinging to things because I'm freaked out about him leaving for England. Things are finally so good between us. We've had an amazing summer and he's finally back in my life, and now I'm supposed to let him go? How can I do that? What if he goes to England and meets someone else? What if he decides our relationship isn't that important to him? ARRRGGGHHHHHH!!! I need to chill out.

Okay, must go pack and stop obsessing over what ifs...