I'm so aggravated. It's like everyone else gets what they want except me. I don't want a stupid car. I don't want fancy clothes or expensive gifts. I just want Josh. :(

First thing this morning Jennifer tells me that she's going to visit Josh next weekend in New York. She has an audition for their acting program. I know she's totally in love with Terry now, but it still makes me uneasy. It's not fair. I want to see him!!!! :(

The other annoyance is that Nancy walks up to me at lunch and mentions that she was talking to Josh on the phone last night. She said she was trying to convince him to come down for the weekend to hang out with her but he had plans to go to Connecticut. I guess it's better that he's going to Connecticut instead of hanging out with her but why was he talking to her on the phone? And what's in Connecticut anyway?

I hate this! Why can't I just get over this guy? It's like he's left an indelible mark on my heart and now I can't shake him. I wish I could just move on and be happy. I just don't know how to let him go.